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When to Divorce

If you’re in an unhappy marriage and feel you’re out of options for making it work, it’s probably time to take the next step – contacting a local divorce or family attorney. Although no one wants to get a divorce, sometimes it’s the only option, especially when domestic abuse is involved. Because the American Psychological Association tells us that the way parents resolve conflict in their marriage directly affects how well their child is able to respond to things that happen in everyday life, now is the time for you to find out whether or not a divorce is the best decision for you and your children.

Life is short. You owe it to yourself, and your children, to do everything in your power so you can live a happy life.

Legal Grounds for Divorce in North Dakota
There are 2 options when it comes to the legal grounds for filing a divorce in North Dakota – no-fault and fault. No fault means married couples can file for divorce stating irreconcilable differences, which means the couple has determined they’re not able to make the marriage work, and for that reason would like to dissolve the marriage. Filing on the legal grounds of fault requires at least one of the following to be taking place in the marriage – adultery, spousal abuse, extreme cruelty, willful desertion, willful neglect, alcohol abuse, substance abuse, felony conviction.

North Dakota’s strict domestic abuse laws offer protection in the form of protection orders, which not only protects you from domestic abuse, it protects your children, as well.

When to Divorce
Divorce is often the only way out if you’re in an abusive marriage. According to the American Association for Marriage & Family Therapy (AAMFT), the current divorce rate in America is calculated to be between 40 and 60% for those recently married, and up to 10% higher for remarriages, so you’re not alone. If you’ve exhausted yourself trying to fix your broken marriage, and are now considering divorce, there are certain signs that can help you determine if divorce is indeed the answer when it comes to getting out of your abusive marriage.

There are 2 types of abuse – physical abusive and emotional abuse – with both having the potential to cause harm to all involved. It’s recommended you seek divorce help if you’re experiencing one or more of the following marriage issues:

  • You fear physical violence
  • Your spouse is unfaithful, again
  • You have extreme differing values
  • Financial reckless behavior is taking place
  • Any addiction that’s affecting you negatively
  • Lack of respect for each other
  • There’s more negative than positive events taking place in your life
  • Your children are negatively affected
  • You’ve been trying to work things out for a long time, and it’s not working.

If you think you’re in an abusive marriage and are looking for a way out, you should speak to a divorce or a Family Law Attorney.

Divorce Effect on Children
While children may not be the direct victim of any domestic abuse taking place in the home, they do suffer the repercussions, i.e. terror, emotional withdrawal, displaced rage, and even divided loyalties. Because parents are often so wrapped up in their marriage turmoil, they often don’t realize the detrimental effect an abusive marriage can have on children, until the damage has already been done. Although you may want to stay in your marriage for the sake of your children, the trauma your children may be experiencing by being in an abusive household often tends to be much more traumatic.

Since research shows that divorce is often a better choice for the children vs. living with parents who are in an abusive marriage, it’s essential for parents to limit any conflict associated with the divorce process for their child’s well-being.

Hankey Law – Divorce Attorney in Grand Forks


It’s simple. If you’re experiencing any form of spousal abuse, you’re going to need to talk with a Divorce and Family Law Attorney. If you’re living in Grand Forks or Fargo or surrounding area in North Dakota, give us a call. Our caring team of divorce professionals can help guide you through this difficult period. When you choose Hankey Law to represent you in a divorce, understand that we’re fully committed to doing what’s in your best interest. We’ll be there with you every step of the way. We’ll guide you through the divorce process, one step at a time.